17: What have you been DOING to this guitar?

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Just caught a commercial for Guitar Hero World Tour (looking suspiciously like some OTHER three-piece band game by another company who simply bought the development company) but here’s the cooperative cross-over from hell:

Kentucky Friend Chicken.

Really? REALLY? Anybody’s who’s ever been passed the five-buttoned Guitar Hero controller immediately after a particularly sweaty-handed rendition of “Welcome to the Jungle” will know why this is a bad idea. Deep-fried chicken and plastic guitar buttons do NOT mix.

Waiting for the other shoe: Pizza and Wii (oh wait, THAT’S why everyone was spanging their controllers off their $3,000 plasma screens).

Of course, I routinely maw down (or is it mow down?) on licorice Goodies (which are recently GOODIER meaning more licorice and less half-crumbly candy stickettes) while sitting in front of my keyboard at work.

Oh, while doing some other stuff, I ran into a design site that has some stuff that nicely blew my mind for a good five minutes.

Part of the (literally) mind blowing Don't Play With Monkey

Part of the (literally) mind blowing Don't Play With Monkey

Oh, and in my days as a desktop technician, I’ve been called on a number of times to do data recovery for drives that have “died,” or are making horrible clicking noises. For the first time (as far as I know), someone has actually collected all the horrible click, grinding, chirping and buzzing noises hard drives make when they’re playing possum. Now, you just go to this site and listen to the various noises and weird pinging that hard drives make, and then explains what’s probably going on with the drive. (via Hack-A-Day). Might not save your data, but saves you from opening your computer case, sticking the phone in there and saying “So, is that bad?” to the guy at Best Buy.

Oh, and never ever ever EVAR take your computer to a place like Future Shop or Best Buy. Seriously, as much as we hate doing support for our friends (because of the whole “last touchies” thing, we generally don’t want to see you get screwed by some jerkwad at the store, who was selling cel phones yesterday.

And now, based on watching Canada’s Worst Driver season 4, I’ve decided that most of these people should just never drive ever again. I mean, the friends/spouses/children of these bad drivers have put them up to this, but I wonder if they can actually just plain call the cops instead, and say “Uh, yeah, you know what? Bob just shouldn’t be driving any more, like, at all.” How do these people get their licenses in the first place?

Sorta like that comedian I heard years ago, who suggested magnetic darts that you could harpoon into other cars who do stupid things, and the cops would automatically pull over anyone with three or more darts. At 10 darts, they just run you off the road.

Porches, Ferraris, and HumVees ship with two permanent darts.


Oh, and if you’re in a restaurant, with your family, and you have one of those Bluetooth earpiece things in your ear?

That’s a ‘poonin’.

Posted on November 17th 2008 in General, Grumpy Old Man, Hardware, Hey Cool

5 Responses to “17: What have you been DOING to this guitar?”

  1. Zen Render Says:

    Oh and…

    Could I please stop beginning paragraphs with “Oh, and”?


  2. Zen Render Says:

    Heh. “Kentucky FRIEND Chicken.”

    Go ME!

  3. cheesefairy Says:

    Don’t eat your friends.

    Oh, and I read an interview with a local guy (Mizzle) who was on that driver show and my god he sounded like an asshole. He was bragging about being busy and easily distracted while he drives and that’s why he’s always rear-ending people. As someone who has been rear-ended I don’t think he gets what a pain in the ass it is.

    Of course then I saw him on the cable access station and he made the same joke about rear-ending people and it was clearly a sexual innuendo (unlike my paragraph above) and then I hated him even more. I hope a cube van rear ends him at a red light and he has to take the bus for a while.
    That’s what I hope.

  4. MonkeyPants Says:

    As someone who drives for, well, not a living, but pocket money and Christmas present money, let me say that there are some atrocious drivers out there. A couple of times today I slowed down to thirty just to keep a really bad one in my sights. If they’re in front of you, it’s harder for them to hit you.

    (Captcha: animals blood. Am I angrier than I think?)

  5. NaBloPoMo: Day 28 | Gecko Bloggle Says:

    […] you get set up with it, because hey, it’s yours, and techies don’t like play “last touchies” with your personal gear.  If I can’t tell you what NOT to do with it, how can it be […]

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