{"id":87614104,"date":"2006-10-10T18:01:57","date_gmt":"2006-10-11T02:01:57","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.geckotemple.com\/blog\/?p=87614104"},"modified":"2006-10-10T18:01:57","modified_gmt":"2006-10-11T02:01:57","slug":"dear-jackass-busdriver","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.geckotemple.com\/blog\/?p=87614104","title":{"rendered":"Dear Jackass Busdriver"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Every afternoon, I take your bus from work to the nearest Skytrain station. Total time I spend on your particular bus is usually somewhere between 15-20 minutes. You an older, sorta grumpy-lookin&#8217; guy, and I feel like maybe, in your twilight years with Translink, you&#8217;ve forgotten the point of wearing your jacket.<\/p>\n<p>Drive the bus.\u00a0 Keep us safe.\u00a0 Get as many people home as quickly as possible.<\/p>\n<p>Today, you kinda screwed up.<\/p>\n<p>In you fifth round of your fave song to sing on speaker-phone-aoke, namely &#8220;Move to the back of the bus,&#8221; you thought you&#8217;d make a point, and hold us all up by turning the bus OFF until we crushed into the last six feet at the back. I&#8217;ve seen you do this before &#8211; last week, you turned off the bus so a little old lady would stop eating from a tiny bag of Cheerios, and once you admonished someone that they could kill somone with a nut allergy (they had a bite of a granola bar).<\/p>\n<p>Today it kinda backfired though, huh?<\/p>\n<p>When the bus wouldn&#8217;t start again?\u00a0 Yeah?<\/p>\n<p>Sorta&#8230;. Looked like a bit of a schmuck, didn&#8217;t you?\u00a0 Mmm?<\/p>\n<p>You could have pulled it out of the bag though, by acting at least a little sheepish about turning off your bus mid-route in order to embarass folks into gettin&#8217; friendly at the back of the ol&#8217; number 25, but no, you acted like it just suddenly died, with no help from you.<\/p>\n<p>So everyone piled off the bus, and the next 25 picked up maybe 20 of the 70-ish of us.\u00a0 I wasn&#8217;t one of them, and started walking to the next stop to wait.<\/p>\n<p>I gotta say, I shouldn&#8217;t have been surprised to see you go sailing past the next stop with exactly eight people on your magically-working-again bus.<\/p>\n<p>Thanks for not stopping.<\/p>\n<p>Tomorrow I&#8217;m wearing mittens made of peanutbutter, and we&#8217;ll who shuts off what first.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Every afternoon, I take your bus from work to the nearest Skytrain station. Total time I spend on your particular bus is usually somewhere between 15-20 minutes. You an older, sorta grumpy-lookin&#8217; guy, and I feel like maybe, in your twilight years with Translink, you&#8217;ve forgotten the point of wearing your jacket. Drive the bus.\u00a0 [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-87614104","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-general"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.geckotemple.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/87614104","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.geckotemple.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.geckotemple.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.geckotemple.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.geckotemple.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=87614104"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.geckotemple.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/87614104\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.geckotemple.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=87614104"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.geckotemple.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=87614104"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.geckotemple.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=87614104"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}