New Kitten!

My learning curve has bent like a grade nine parabola exercise, like Scarlett O’Hara’s waistline, like I expect my will has been bent, over the past day.

We got a kitten.

Here is the Kitten ActivityLog (From his POV) over his first 14 or so hours in our home:

6pm: Get to new sweet pad. Exit carrier box. Stare at self in mirror. Decide cat in mirror is a threat. Hide behind Big New Cat, who keeps trying to socialise me like I’m a dog. What is with that bitch, anyhow? I forgive her, I rub her with my ass to let her know I like her. Inexplicably, she goes out The Big Door. How can she cater to me if she’s not inside the new sweet pad?
6:01pm-9:20pm: Explore. Run around. Jump at imaginary bugs. See how big paws get. Brief periods of rest being a black hole of cute snoring kittenness. Rest on Even Bigger Cat. Snore contentedly, cause Even Bigger Cat to completely fall in love, irrevocably and forever.
9:21pm: Hey! What’s that? Big New Cat came back! She must want me to eat her toes! I love this family!
9:43-2:00am: Hey, this plastic bag is, like dangerous or an alien or something! I’m going to pounce on it a lot and see what happens! OoooOOo! What’s that? A scarf? Let me attack it! Look at me wrestle! I am soooooo fierce! Oh, suddenly tired. I’ll have a nap. (Cute snoring, little twitches) Hey! What’s that? Let’s see if I can climb it! (shred curtains)

2:30am: Hey, where are those bigger cats going? Into that room with the big soft thing? Why? What are they doing? They’re lying on it? Why? We’re playing out here!

2:55: Playing is boring without New Big Cat and Even Bigger Cat. Hmph.

3am-8am: I will sleep completely equidistant to Big New Cat and Even Bigger Cat. (No favourites here) That way, I will be able to roll into their faces as they sleep. This is a good life!
8:03am: Hey, this is warm! Big New Cat rolled over and her neck is exposed. If I actually climb up onto her neck I can share the warmth and love. Mmm, warmth. Wait, hey, no, why is she shaking and coughing like that? This is uncomfortable.
8:05:am: Maybe if I run back and forth over Big New Cat’s face and Even Bigger Cat’s face, they’ll know how exited I am to be here! Yeah! That’s it! C’mon, wake up and play!
8:10am: Mmm, what’s this? Big New Cat has earlobes! I think I will suck them! Hello, earlobes. Why is she laughing at me? I’m going to save face by licking my ass. Then go back to her earlobes.
8:11am: Why won’t she let me near her earlobes?

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