My house has a potential buyer. An airline attendant whose hobby is real estate would like to buy my house for her 24-year-old son.

So many things are wrong with that sentence.

In any case, at first the potential buyer wanted vacant tenancy. However, we didn’t know when that was going to be, since her purchase is contingent on the house inspection. Legally, she has to give us two months to move, but when would those two months start from? In all reality, she could leave us dangling until we were fighting for places alongside the August influx of UBC students, or even worse, September.

This whole process has been so invasive. E’s got almost all of his guitars and music stuff stashed at a friend’s. We get the place spruced up for people who don’t show up. And then, we’re told, “You have to move, but I’m not telling you exactly when.”

So we’ve decided to move. We’ll be looking to move June 1. Moving is stressful, but not knowing when is more stressful. So.

Then today I get an email from the realtor, passing on an offer from the potential buyer: Would we like to stay on, with a rent increase of $150, and start paying utilities?

Hunh. Would we? We would not. We don’t have any control of the heat down here. That in itself is okay, since we don’t pay for utilities now. They’re included. But I’m not paying for something I can’t control. Plus, we don’t know if Mr. 24-year-old takes 30-minute showers, or sleeps with all the lights on. Or if he has wild parties. And I don’t like Ms. Flight Attendant enough to pay her mortgage.

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