MonkeyPants

Polishing Up.

Enrollment is down so I had yesterday off. I could have used the money, but I also needed the time.

First thing, I bought a strapless bra to hike up the girls. I ran around the bra store looking for something heavy, and the bra I bought has my full trust: It stays up while I jump up and down  with a big metal stapler in my cleavage! Now THAT is quality support.

Also, I got my dad a plain periwinkle blue tie that rocks with his suit and will go with his eyes perfectly. Score!

And then I solved my shoe dilemma! I had heels I thought would work, but I couldn’t really walk in them. But it turns out Sandii and Collen DO know how to walk in heels, and directed me around on Broadway until I could sashay with the best of them. “More hip! Don’t look down! The core! The core! Use the core! Float! Tiny steps!” they yelled as I teetered past the other pedestrians.

I got a lot of funny looks, and some plain guffaws, but I actually think Simon pretending to walk in heels was funnier than me actually learning. Although if he shaved, Simon would make quite a cute transvestite. But he would never be able to fill out my new bra.