Sometimes people do not live up to one’s expectations. Today, I saw that in a bunch of ways.
1) I am playing hooky even as I type. I was tired and it was raining, and I just thought, “Screw it, I can tutor both kids tomorrow and go home and sit on the couch tonight.” I wish I felt worse, but No Frills brand cheddar popcorn, wine, and crap TV are kind of fuzzing my guilt out.
2) I am watching Supernanny. I have never seen this show before. All I can say is, my friends are very good parents. Although I am always amused when they are surprised when their children inevitably learn the F-word. Think about it: It’s made up of easy, uncomplicated Anglo-Saxon sounds. ‘uck’ is one of the easiest phoneme combos to learn. Just add an easy fricative that feels cool, and you have toddlers wandering around with a whole new word, and parents cringing.
3) Bad bus behavior: Brontoschlong. When guys sit in a seat with their knees so far apart they are taking up half of each seat on either side. I’ve decided to combat this one. I am going to out-brontoschlong them. I’m going to stop sitting modestly cross-legged and press back with my own legs. I’m fighting the battle one seat at a time, people. I am going to make them uncomfortable. Because, dude, I paid for this seat with my bus pass. Back off with your mythical giant junk.
4) Boobquake: This isn’t really bad behaviour, unless you’re an Islamic fundamentalist, though. How long before we know if it has worked? I did not participate, because getting my norks out a) at the garage or b) teaching just isn’t the right move for me, but I certainly support the effort.
There was probably some other stuff, but I am here on the couch with my wine and popcorn. I’m fine.