MonkeyPants

Don’t Tip.

I get nervous when the kids tip the chairs. I worry that they’re going to bonk their heads on the concrete-under-carpet floor and do themselves serious damage. I worry they’ll hit the wall and break their necks. I worry that they will somehow (don’t know the physics of this, exactly) bash their teeth out, slipping and hitting the table.

Paranoid much? Yeah. This is why I think I would be a lousy parent. Or maybe you let more go when they’re your own kids. In any case, I get gore-track when kids tip chairs.

In any case, I have the perfect solution for kids tipping chairs. I tell them, “Don’t tip. You’ll fall and bonk your head. All of the English will fall out. You’ll have to go back to ABC, and then all your friends will laugh at you – in English, and you won’t be able to understand!”

It’s a nice compromise, because I’m joking and they know it, but they stop tipping, at least for a while.