New Kitten!

My learning curve has bent like a grade nine parabola exercise, like Scarlett O’Hara’s waistline, like I expect my will has been bent, over the past day.

We got a kitten.

Here is the Kitten ActivityLog (From his POV) over his first 14 or so hours in our home:

6pm: Get to new sweet pad. Exit carrier box. Stare at self in mirror. Decide cat in mirror is a threat. Hide behind Big New Cat, who keeps trying to socialise me like I’m a dog. What is with that bitch, anyhow? I forgive her, I rub her with my ass to let her know I like her. Inexplicably, she goes out The Big Door. How can she cater to me if she’s not inside the new sweet pad?
6:01pm-9:20pm: Explore. Run around. Jump at imaginary bugs. See how big paws get. Brief periods of rest being a black hole of cute snoring kittenness. Rest on Even Bigger Cat. Snore contentedly, cause Even Bigger Cat to completely fall in love, irrevocably and forever.
9:21pm: Hey! What’s that? Big New Cat came back! She must want me to eat her toes! I love this family!
9:43-2:00am: Hey, this plastic bag is, like dangerous or an alien or something! I’m going to pounce on it a lot and see what happens! OoooOOo! What’s that? A scarf? Let me attack it! Look at me wrestle! I am soooooo fierce! Oh, suddenly tired. I’ll have a nap. (Cute snoring, little twitches) Hey! What’s that? Let’s see if I can climb it! (shred curtains)

2:30am: Hey, where are those bigger cats going? Into that room with the big soft thing? Why? What are they doing? They’re lying on it? Why? We’re playing out here!

2:55: Playing is boring without New Big Cat and Even Bigger Cat. Hmph.

3am-8am: I will sleep completely equidistant to Big New Cat and Even Bigger Cat. (No favourites here) That way, I will be able to roll into their faces as they sleep. This is a good life!
8:03am: Hey, this is warm! Big New Cat rolled over and her neck is exposed. If I actually climb up onto her neck I can share the warmth and love. Mmm, warmth. Wait, hey, no, why is she shaking and coughing like that? This is uncomfortable.
8:05:am: Maybe if I run back and forth over Big New Cat’s face and Even Bigger Cat’s face, they’ll know how exited I am to be here! Yeah! That’s it! C’mon, wake up and play!
8:10am: Mmm, what’s this? Big New Cat has earlobes! I think I will suck them! Hello, earlobes. Why is she laughing at me? I’m going to save face by licking my ass. Then go back to her earlobes.
8:11am: Why won’t she let me near her earlobes?

5 Comments to “New Kitten!”

  1. By cheesefairy, February 6, 2006 @ 10:44 am

    oooh.. congratulations! I love kittens. so warm and small and crazy.

  2. By Arwen, February 6, 2006 @ 2:15 pm

    And don’t forget the head squishy. Never forget the crushing. Of Love.

  3. By Liz, February 6, 2006 @ 2:58 pm

    Am squishing the head as I type. Looove the littttle moookey!

    Cat is sleeping across my shoulders as I type. It’s giving me a backache, but I don’t seem to care too much.

  4. By Carol, February 7, 2006 @ 10:43 am

    Exciting! Congratulations! Any thoughts on names? I was reminded recently of how I’d always thought Dr. Grant Roberts (of “Danger Bay,” of course) would make an excellent dog name. But the right kitten might be able to pull it off. And “Dr. Grant” does have a nice ring, doesn’t it?

    In any case, you should totally post pictures, so I can get me some vicarious kitty-loving. Nothing makes the uterus twinge like pictures of baby kitties. (Seriously—nothing. Certainly not pictures of baby humans. And not even pictures of baby dogs. Baby pandas have been known to come close. But baby kitties really are where it’s at.)

  5. By Liz, February 7, 2006 @ 10:36 pm

    His name’s Baxter. Eric knew it the moment he saw him.

    Dr. Grant’s an awesome name, though.

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