Bring It.

So. Apparently, the Self-Confidence Fairy finally found her way to me, after a backorder of about fifteen years, and dumped the accrued years’ worth of self-confidence over me like a trucker pours syrup at IHOP.

First, I called a friend on his bullshit after he insulted E over a matter of what turns out is of very little importance. It was a clash of values, but said friend needs to be schooled in the ways that adults relate to one another. I stepped up.

Then last night, I sang along, loudly, to Journey’s “Any Way You Want It” with no regard to the safety of those around me. I can’t actually sing, so it was a leap of faith for me to do it out in public, with people around me.

After that, I argued with a guy for mocking another guy’s musical taste. Matty likes The Smiths and has no problem with the fact that Morrisey is gay, because he loves Morrisey’s awesome lyrics. Fucktard (an alias) can’t get over the fact that Morrisey is gay, and, so, therefore, Matty must be as well. I argued for a while, but Fucktard had no actual argument (what a surprise). So I simply called Fucktard a boor, and when he looked at me with disbelief, I said, “It’s four fucking letters long. Don’t tell me you don’t know what it means, you moron.” I could blame the two glasses of wine I had consumed, but I’d rather call it self-confidence.

Is this how self-confident people feel all the time? Like there’s champagne in their veins and they’re able to channel a deity? Wow. What have I been missing?

10 Comments to “Bring It.”

  1. By John, October 15, 2007 @ 12:27 pm

    The thing that I used to just think, but will now say from time to time when faced with similar Fucktards about such issues as orientation is this:

    “For someone who claims to be straight, you sure think about dick a lot.”

    I figure I’ll get punched out by someone one day, but in a crowd of people, it’ll often shut someone down who just can’t stop yammering on about the schweens of others, and what they do with the aforementioned schweens.

    And a straight Morrisey lyrical content would be pretty weak, I bet. Much like a happy, well-slept, recently-sexed Prince. It just. doesn’t. work.

  2. By Arwen, October 15, 2007 @ 12:28 pm

    Hilarious. You guys both crack me up.

  3. By John, October 15, 2007 @ 12:28 pm

    Bandname! Schweenyammer. Or should it be Yammerschweeen?

  4. By Arwen, October 15, 2007 @ 12:28 pm

    And good on the confidence, sweetpea. Send the Fairy this way, will you?

  5. By Liz, October 15, 2007 @ 12:32 pm

    John, I’d go with Yammerschweeen. I’m envisioning something with accordions and double-necked guitars.

    Arwen, I’ll send the fairy over pronto.

  6. By rachel, October 15, 2007 @ 1:45 pm

    I believe that’s already the name of a Norwegian cookie-monster death metal band. God I love Norwegian cookie-monster death metal.

  7. By Liz, October 15, 2007 @ 1:50 pm

    Maybe I was thinking of the guitar-wank virtuoso Yngwie Malmsteen.

    Rachel, where is my best source of Norwegian cookie-monster death metal?

  8. By stephanie, October 15, 2007 @ 7:25 pm

    That’s the nice part about getting older.

  9. By Liz, October 15, 2007 @ 9:44 pm

    There had to be some kind of upside, Stephanie.

  10. By sarah, October 17, 2007 @ 6:48 am


    I am greatly enjoying the Liz and John show, and missing all of you. As for the confidence thing, the fairy has only ever visited me briefly from time to time, and felt exactly like that. There are places and situations where I seem to find her more consistently. I should hang out there more.

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