I Am A Crazy Squirrel Lady

We have been watching three baby squirrels frolic about the yard over the past few days. I know they’re only rats with good PR, and they’re destructive and they’re vermin, but these little ones are damn cute!

They like to hang out under the barbecue tarp, and they grunt at me if I get too close. Squirrels grunt! Who knew?

They are also monumentally stupid. I caught a neighbourhood cat about to pounce on one of them yesterday and the stupid squirrel was sitting there growling at it! I shouted and the cat bolted, but the squirrel just sat there blinking at me. They also will run directly between my feet when they’re in the middle of a particularly absorbing game.

So now I find myself compelled to prowl the yard looking for cats, and exhorting the squirrels to climb the trees and stay there, like they can understand me.

Excuse me. It’s time for me to go on Cat Patrol.

6 Comments to “I Am A Crazy Squirrel Lady”

  1. By Beth, September 15, 2008 @ 9:02 pm

    Near where we lived in Ottawa, there was a boulevard with Black Walnut trees. We collected black walnuts one fall, wore rubber gloves to remove the hulls and got stained hands through the gloves. When we were done, we had a large box of black walnuts. They taste wonderful, but they’re so hard, cracking them open was almost impossible. But when I moved to Waterloo, I took the box of nuts.
    One day, I found a squirrel that somehow had made it into the house, and into the box. I’m not sure who was more scared as the squirrel ran around our house trying to escape. Her little claws scratched on the linoleum and our cat took chase. She made it safely out the door, chittering squirrel swear words as she went.
    Life is full of small dramas.

  2. By Arwen, September 16, 2008 @ 10:26 am

    Oh, I remember that squirrel. Remember the pregnant squirrel on Short Street, Beth?

  3. By Beth, September 16, 2008 @ 6:26 pm

    I remember the squirrel. I don’t think she was pregnant, I think she was a nursing mom, all flabby belly and big nipples. She would sit on our sidewalk on her hind legs and beg.
    Not the same squirrel as the black walnut theif. But same home.

  4. By rachel, September 16, 2008 @ 7:07 pm

    Once Scott was just walking along, and a squirrel was running along and it ran right into his leg. And he screamed like a little gir… I’m sorry. He bellowed in a manly fashion. I always get that wrong. snort!

  5. By Liz, September 16, 2008 @ 10:28 pm

    Beth, squirrels used to come inside in my parents’ house. It got unnerving.
    Plus, I have never seen a begging squirrel.
    Rachel, don’t let Scott into my backyard for a while. He might, ahem, bellow in a manly fashion when the babies decide he is a jungle gym.

  6. By cheesefairy, September 18, 2008 @ 7:12 am

    “They say she talks to squir-rels / say she calls them out by their nay-haymes.”

    I am only really familiar with park squirrels, who tend to be quite mangy and rough around the edges. They’re like the panhandlers of the squirrel world – some of them have their charms but mostly you steer clear.

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