·:[ Pomodoro ]:·
• • • • •

I don’t think that I need say more to any of you that have met or heard of my mother.

On a pleasant note, my beautiful baby is now 10 weeks old!

I know that I have promised more pictures so I thought that I should deliver.

My child is just too cute for words! (If I may say so)

Our beautiful Marvin is as healthy as can be. We have overcome Thrush of the worst degree and that has left us with a generally happier baby. Not that this surprises me, anyone who has ever had a yeast infection can imagine that feeling in your mouth might be a little bloody unpleasant. (My poor little girl)
Stuck with that, undiagnosed for 6 weeks was absolutely brutal for me and my breasts, so I’m sure it was a cake walk for an infant.

Beyond that she is in wonderful shape and is only suffering from boredom as her broken mother tries to recover from what has felt, physically, like the worst 8 weeks of her life, and so never takes her out to do anything interesting.

(Pity me moment) Working from top to bottom, I’m using cortisone for an ear problem, acidophilus and canesten for yeasty nipples (which made nursing feel like sticking your nipple into a pencil sharpener), Cranmax for the bladder infection caused by the stress of ‘back-end tearing’ which requires medication of its own. Ouch, ouch and more f*#kin’ ouch. And as an added bonus today I was cauterized with silver nitrate in a place I would recommend any burning ever happen to anyone, for stitches that still haven’t healed after 8 weeks.
I haven’t sat down without pain since December 18th, and I feel like screaming at least once an hour. (pity moment over)
So I guess you really do heal in your sleep after all, and would that just be the one thing that doesn’t happen in this house anymore.

The house is quiet so I’d better go nap.

Ok so now that I have had enough sleep to recover from my delirium of laboring in a hospital room for 54 hours with next to no sleep, I seem to be at home with a baby.

A baby that really looks unlike (ok, other than the nose), however I do seem to have a vivid recollection of having this same baby ripped from my loins not long ago, and seeing as no one has made an attempt to retrieve her from our possession, after a couple of weeks JLo and I have decided to keep her.

So, I would like to introduce my daughter Marvin. Who seems to do all of the same things in the world that she did inutero, just louder, and whose quarter Jamaican heritage seems to have been trounced by her Scottish/Irish.

Details to follow after more napping.

Sadly it looks like we will be dumping my birth plan because after another day in the hospital we are told we have low amniotic fluid and preeclampsia so induction it will be, likely tomorrow or Wednesday.

A nasty ho’ of a doctor let me know that my chances of a C-section are very high with induction due to an unfavorable cervix, and that she was “within her power to keep us there today if she wanted” so I looked up the unfavorable cervix issue and found that an unfavorable cervix is one that is firm and undilated as these tend to be less receptive to inductions. I however would like to say that not only did Dr. Ho’ NOT look up my bits to check my ‘unfavorable cervix’ but right there in my file it states that half a week ago I was soft, effacing  and dilating even if it was a little my books call this favorable. So fuck off and keep your half assed opinions to yourself.

Needless to say off I go to bed now in the vain attempt to sleep (or maybe have sex for the last time as a manatee non-parent) with the knowledge that in one way or another I have a long hard day tomorrow and all I can hope right now is that I wake up less angry and disappointed than I feel right now.

I hope also that the next post finds up well and a plus a healthy baby.

The eviction notice that was previously posted to the current tenant has unfortunately met with silence. We are now moving toward legal action.

We are at this point less than 5 days from our ‘due date’.

I had really hoped that we would not make it this far.

However, we do have a loose ETA in that we won’t be allowed to pass Christmas without an induction, due to a marked increase in blood pressure for me and at least one episode of mild fetal tachycardia for Marvin.

So please, please everyone!, a prayer, a wish, a plea in my direction (whichever suits you best) that I go into labor in the next, say, 36 hours to 72 hours!

I sit here enduring the Chinese water torture that is pre-labor contractions, very few and far between but getting more and more painful. No real beginning in sight and there for no real end either. For a week now we have been at -2 station, 1 cm dilated and soft, for those of you who might not know what those lovely medical terms mean, we’re really close now to any second starting labor (duh, we’re 5 days to the due date!)

Buy the way, to all of you lovely people that came to my Baby Shower over a month ago I extend a huge heartfelt thank you! I realize that I am a thoroughly ungrateful retch for taking this long to say so, but I had such a wonderful time with all of you and would like an excuse to do it more often. Also plus the gifts were fantastic, you generous, beautiful people! Thank you all.

Eviction Notice 

The current tenant has 15 days to gather her belongings and vacate the premises. After which she will be physically removed from the property. She is being evicted due to breach of contract and destruction of property.

 Expansions only to the front of the house, within reasonable limits, were discussed. Not only have these limits been exceeded, but expansions to the back of the house were also made. Remodeling and gutting of the home was never approved, nor was changing the initial layout and base structure.

Due to property damage caused by these unapproved renovations, there are now leaks in both the upper and lower levels of the home.

Any further problems will result in immediate and forceful removal.

Please attach to belly button

So last week a baby shower was thrown for me. My lovely mother hosted it at a friend of hers place. Biting the bullet for my close friends was Monkeypants, although somehow I managed to get Miss Arwen to sacrifice herself as well. I just need to say thank you again to these two lovely ladies for putting themselves in the line of fire for me. It warms my heart that you sat there for hours listening and lessening the impact of a gaggle of slow colourless Christian suburban housewives, Costco platters and trivia games, without even a cigarette break. You really must love me.

….. By the way I have found both of your “shower attendance gifts”… you seem to have left them behind in the car…..I know that that could not have been on purpose so I’ll have them for you here on Sat.

Speaking of Saturday! My ‘people I would love to see Baby Shower’ is this Saturday. I am so very looking forward to hanging out with all of you people that I rarely or never get to see (plus those of you that I also love and see more often). So please come. We’ll have wine. And cheese. And NO games. And babies are welcome (hint, hint Cheesefairy) Anyway, I’m looking forward to celebrating the fact that I will be less than seven weeks away from not being pregnant anymore!!!!!

And welcoming the new baby of course.