Funerals are funny happenings. Not funny, ha-ha, (although they can be) but funny, strange. All those people, from all the places in the deceased’s life, together to try and say goodbye.

Often these events are held in the place of worship the deceased attended, at one point or another. This may make many of the mourners uncomfortable, as they may not be of that particular faith, or of any faith at all.

Today was one of those times. I was at a funeral for my Great-Auntie Bunny, who was the wife of my grandmother’s youngest brother. Still with me?

It was held at the Tsawassen United Church. United churches don’t squick me out. They’re a lot like Unitarian churches. But a couple of things in the service bothered me.

1) The minister used a microphone. I don’t know, but to me, microphones are distinctly un-holy.

2) Someone got up and sang. The words were something to the effect of ‘We’ll meet again and have a good time”, as is standard in these situations. But the music (a CD recording) sounded like a Disney love song. You know, where Pocohontas is singing to the trees and stuff? Not really appropriate for mourning, in my eyes.

3) The minister quoted from the New International Version of the Bible: “In my Father’s house are many rooms”, said Jesus. I much prefer the King James Version, where “In my father’s house, there are many mansions.” Note to Y’all. No New International Version for me, if you’re wondering what to say at my funeral.

4) The minister tried to keep it timely and prayed for the victims of a shooting crime that happened in Montreal today. Hey, I thought today was about Bunny, not some people in Montreal!

It was strange. I’ve only ever been at home in one church, but I guess My Father’s house has many churches as well.

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