Suited.

With my brother and Carol getting married later this month, I’ve been excited about a lot. But as always, there’s been some stress.

One thing that’s been stressing me is that Dad had to buy a suit. He thinks he threw his old one out. Not a suit guy.  Anyway, he couldn’t find it, so he had to buy a new one.  Why would this be a stress for YOU? I hear you ask.

Well, Dad’s colorblind.  And that one suit that served the non-suit guy for 30 years was what he thought was charcoal grey, but was actually a very deep green.  He bought it to marry my mom, and I think she always meant to ask about it, why he had a green suit, but she never did, because he wore it so seldom, and when he did put it on (weddings and some funerals, and usually bargained down to a tweed jacket and slacks) she was always preoccupied with the minutiae of the events themselves, or wrangling kids, or whatever, that she never got around to asking.  When she found out, she called me in a tizzy.

“Do you know your father thinks he has been wearing a charcoal grey suit for 30 years?”

Of course, I didn’t know. I’d seen him in it maybe twice in my life, and I never thought about it. My dad has a green suit. So? He wears a jacket and slacks to anythng fancy.

So today I went to the suit store and looked at the classic charcoal with blue pinstripe my father chose, and all the little gears in my brain shifted. It’s classic. It’s a little English Morning dress. I could totally see my dad in that suit, and I wish my mom could see what an excellent, non-green choice he’d made!

But Dad had charged me with choosing a tie. So the salesman and I  went to the tie display. And the salesman was all, “This is a  stripe that will work with this suit.”

Um, no. I thought. This stripe with my dad’s suit looks like he’s an extra in a Broadway play about stockbrokers.

“No,  he’s more subtle.  He’s a very quiet person. There’s too much pattern,” I said.

He whizzed around the tie display. “This one is a very subtle paisley. This one matches. Here’s one that is a little tone-on-tone.”

One was loud enough for the Pride Parade. Another was a glossy satin like a cable channel televangelist would wear. One made me think that the wearer probably would owe allegiance to the Russian mob. WTF was the guy thinking?

So I told him I’d go and think it over, sice buying a tie is a hard decision. And tomorrow, I am going to go buy the solid-colour tie I have in mind. A smoky cobalt-ish blue.  I’m going to The Bay, because salespeople never bug you there.

5 Comments to “Suited.”

  1. By Arwen, June 11, 2009 @ 9:29 am

    A Broadway play about stockbrokers! laughing

  2. By Stephanie, June 11, 2009 @ 9:37 am

    I’m always amazed when I find out people are color blind. I think it’s fascinating.
    And, also, I think it’s a funny story about the green suit.

  3. By Carol, June 11, 2009 @ 5:33 pm

    Do you have any idea how touched I am that your dad bought a new suit for the wedding? I was honestly expecting (and really wouldn’t have minded) the old tweed jacket and slacks. But it’s so sweet that he went all fancy for us!

  4. By Beth, June 11, 2009 @ 8:17 pm

    I knew an artist who was colour blind. He did most of his work in pencil crayon and he chose colours based on what it said on the pencil.
    I was a camp cook and he would come to camp and do sketches of all the junior campers. There are books full of his sketches at the camp.
    Anyway, I made home made ice-cream (the kids did the cranking) and then a hot fudge sauce to go with it.
    Supper was meat loaf and I had put small pitchers of ketchup on the tables (we bought it in huge jugs). Then the chocolate sauce went on the tables in identical pitchers. And Gerry happily poured a large glug of ketchup all over his ice-cream as everyone at the table yelled at him, a second too late. That’s how I learned he was colour blind.
    Captcha: endless today’s

  5. By Liz, June 12, 2009 @ 12:03 am

    Arwen, the ties really were that showy.
    Stephanie, it’s strange to me, too. I used to ask my dad, well, what does red LOOK like? And he’d say, it was like green but not. Helpful? No.
    Carol, Dad Does It Right when it’s important. Whatever he thinks that is. This is important.
    Beth, how amazing that that was the first time you’d detected it, and how awful an outing it must have been for him. (Also what a waste of ice cream unless you have unusual tastes.)

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